[Ciara] (Unencrypted e-mail) Date: Morning of January 13, 2004 (Japan) / Evening of January 12, 2004 (Maine) Subject: Getting Back to You To: Wataru Yamada So yeah, I actually saw your first two texts before I got to my first class, but *right* before I got to my first class. And then after that class, I had a quick break but most of it was taken up by figuring out where my next class was, then that class, lunch (and I at least got a response to you then, but I wanted to give you a longer one), lecture discussion session (yes, they really did this on the first day but it was good to meet the TA and stuff), practice, dinner, and now back to the dorms. This is kind of going to be my life for the next few months, so I apologize in advance. ^_^; Anyhow, I'm glad you took such good care of Izumi. You're a good friend. And, well, I mean... I don't really know anything about your parents, though we can certainly talk about them at some point if you would like, but... I'd hope they'd be proud of you. And man, I am *so* sorry about the video chat bill! I honestly didn't mean to get you in trouble. I know we won't be doing it on a regular basis, but still. Should we be cutting back on texting as well? Or is that a separate bill? Also, what is it with you all and worrying about me getting attacked by a moose? ;) First Katie, now you. Maybe that's what you guys should talk about - moose attack prevention. Hope your classes and things go well today! Satoshi P. S. I may have mailed you a package yesterday. I have no idea when it'll arrive in Japan, but let me know when it does? --- [Jihatsu] (Unencrypted e-mail) Date: late afternoon of January 13, 2004 (Japan) / early morning of January 13, 2004 (Maine) Subject: Re: Getting Back to You To: Satoshi Watanabe OMG WHAT, a package??! Okay, so, first things first, send me a list of any snacks and stationery and everyday needs you're missing from here, because I GOT this. Second, moose prevention is a great topic. I will ease into that, and then gradually talk about Other Things. Speaking of Other Things, did you mention that one of you was going to teach me how to encrypt emails? Should I be asking someone about that? My parents are pretty great. They sent me a package too - I can show you what's in it next time we video chat. I think they wish they could have been around yesterday, too, even if they didn't say that exactly.... ...yeah. We can talk about it. But, don't worry about the internet bill - I can take care of it. And we did say that like, long chats like that would be only a sometimes thing! I actually pay my own phone bill, so that shouldn't be a problem. And anyway, I like talking with you :) We can definitely make it work. Oh, I might look into internet cafes, too! Might be cost-effective, depending on what we end up doing in the long run. [he stares at "in the long run" for a really long time, before deciding to go with it after all.] How are your classes so far? Topics seem cool? Any interesting teachers or classmates? :) Talk to you soon, Wataru --- [Ciara] (Unencrypted e-mail) Date: Morning of January 14, 2004 (Japan) / Evening of January 13, 2004 (Maine) Subject: Instructions To: Wataru Yamada Here's all the stuff about encrypting e-mails. [BLAH BLAH TECHNICAL EXPLANATION] If you can't read my next reply, let me know. Satoshi --- [Ciara] (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Morning of January 14, 2004 (Japan) / Evening of January 13, 2004 (Maine) Subject: To: Wataru Yamada Okay, so assuming I gave you the correct instructions, you should be able to read this. You really don't need to send me anything! ...uh, okay, you really don't need to send me anything right now. I may check back with you later in the semester when I've used up more of my supplies. Although if you could find a way to magically transport over a Family Mart, that would be awesome. (Note: please do not actually attempt to magically transfer over a Family Mart.) I miss conbini something fierce. People laughed at me last semester when I was excited about spotting a 7-11, but I didn't realize the difference between a Japanese one and an American one back then. E-mail encryption has been covered. Keep me posted on discussion of Other Things? [Satoshi types and deletes and types and deletes and types and deletes before settling on the following line:] Sure, I'll look forward to seeing it, and I'll be up for talking about however much you want to talk about. When you do call me, you should call my cell phone. You won't get international charges. Let's just say it's not exactly standard issue. ;) And are you talking about internet cafes for video chats? I'd really rather not do that. I'd be constantly worrying about what I could say in public (or semi-public?) and I'd prefer to just keep being able to talk about whatever we wanted. But yeah, I'm sure we can work it out. Classes are good so far! I've had one session of each now and they all seem reasonably interesting and manageable. Of course, things looked pretty good at the start of last semester and that almost ended in disaster, so. But I am determined to avoid a repeat of that and I'm already blocking out study periods on my calendar. Is it weird that I'm actually excited about my English class? There's going to be a fair amount of writing assignments and it's not going to be easy, but I'm actually looking forward to trying this. How are your classes going? Oh, yeah, and I'm attaching my game schedule like you asked - thankfully we have home games this weekend so I don't have to worry about traveling after my first week of classes. Satoshi [attachment: gameschedule.txt] (OOC - which is, in fact, this: http://www.hockeyeastonline.com/men/me/sched04.php - the only differences in the Neo-Arcana-verse so far being that there were no games on 12/27, 12/28, or 1/4) --- [Jihatsu] (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Evening of January 14, 2004 (Japan) / Morning of January 14, 2004 (Maine) Subject: Testing testing! To: Satoshi Watanabe Heyyyyyyyyyyy are you getting this??? Guess who's not the most technical guy around? If this works, then I will talk about Other Things. In the meantime, have some other blather which may or may not get through to you since my last like seventeen tries ended in disasterrrr testestest Um, I like kittens and also the sound of thunderstorms at night! Today I had spaghetti for lunch! Test testestestestest --- [Ciara] (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Evening of January 14, 2004 (Japan) / Morning of January 14 (Maine) Subject: Re: Testing testing! To: Wataru Yamada Yep, I got this one. Also, this is good information to know. ;) Satoshi --- [Jihatsu] Wataru sits for a long long moment, pressing against his eyeballs with the palms of his hands. Of COURSE, of COURSE that is the one that went through. Well, he could have said much worse things..... (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Evening of January 14, 2004 (Japan) / Morning of January 14 (Maine) Subject: Re: Re: Testing testing! To: Satoshi Watanabe Ok! So. First, internet cafes - ah, I see why you wouldn't want to do that! No worries. Yeah, I wish I wasn't so dependent on my aunt for money.... But it's not like TROUBLE trouble. Just, don't do it again kind of trouble. Which, you know, we already said we wouldn't do it every day or whatever, so it should be fine? Your phone sounds awesome. Let me guess - Kaede? He's really techy, right? I kind of got that. And thanks for the hockey schedule! Got a game the day after tomorrow, huh? Are Massachusetts any good? Sounds like a hockey-ey place. Good luck!! Glad to hear your classes are going all right. Mine are... I dunno. I'm not super inspired, honestly. I have to take this lame Statistics course that already looks horrendous, the one about Japanese internal affairs is, just, groan... At least the class on Immigrants and Immigration in Japan sounds really interesting, but I can tell it's going to be hard. How do you find the motivation to study hard? I used to have it, but now.... I don't actually have much to say about Other Things right now. Still nervous about meeting Katie and Haruko - do you really think it's okay for me to tell them about, well, the thing we talked about? With the paintbrush? Honestly, I had forgotten about it for a while, until I found the brush again. It's like when I touch it, I can almost understand him. Not quite. It's kind of like trying to remember a dream... I kind of want to video chat with you again, if only for a shorter time. Maybe after I meet with them? You've kind of ended up being like my anchor in all this Arcana stuff, so if you're up for it, I'd really appreciate a short talk. [Wataru spends a good 20 minutes struggling over a long followup paragraph, then rubs his eyes, sighs, and deletes it.] Anyway, it's getting super late here. Statistics at 8:30, WHY. Talk to you later, Wataru --- [Ciara] Satoshi looks at his inbox. There are two threads from his friends going on right now: the one with Wataru that started out as talking about Coming of Age Day, and the other with the group that started out talking about the road trip but has now gone into something else entirely. Something he's not sure he feels like addressing at the moment, but he probably should anyway. Still, if he wants to write the one that's going to be easier to do first and put off thinking about Temperance and memories for a little bit, he doesn't see the harm in that. ***** (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Morning of January 15, 2004 (Japan) / Evening of January 14, 2004 (Maine) Subject: Re: Re: Re: Testing testing! To: Wataru Yamada Well, next time we can set a timer or something to make sure we don't run over? We'll think of something. I'm not *saying* anything about my phone, you understand? ;) Massachusetts is pretty good. We're better. ...wow, okay, that didn't sound arrogant at all. But I mean... this is an *amazing* team. Seriously. And I can keep up with their level of play. Sure, it's on the fourth line (and occasionally the third) but... I'm doing this. It makes me think that maybe this crazy dream of mine isn't so crazy after all. Not gonna lie, playing is the main reason I came here, but I also actually want a degree. I just wish I knew *what* degree. Your classes are all so specific! As for studying hard, well, needing a friend to bail me out of almost failing a course right before the final is pretty good motivation. The guys help, too. For all the grief I give him, Liam is incredibly good at time management and even if we're not taking any of the same classes, studying with him and Grant is really helpful. If they're not too busy I might get one of them to look over my English assignments just to make sure I'm not making stupid mistakes. Native language check and all. Why do you think you're losing your motivation? [Satoshi takes a while to write the next two paragraphs, and he keeps swapping over to look at Haruko's most recent e-mail as he does so.] Tell them, Wataru. Please. Tell them. It's not like they don't know you took it. The longer you go without saying anything, the bigger of a thing it'll turn into. Although if it helps you understand Uehara, I'm not sure if that's a credit to your abilities or something else entirely. I've never really felt all that comfortable being around him. Part of this is that he's the real Ace. I haven't figured out if we're connected somehow or if it's just some weird coincidence. Admittedly I haven't really put that much effort into it. We can definitely talk after you meet with them. I'm not really sure how good of an anchor I make, but... I'll try. Regarding classes... on the one hand, I don't have any that start earlier than 9, but on the other, I also get up before the crack of dawn a lot of days to get in some practice. I am finally starting to understand the appeal of drinking coffee. Satoshi --- [Jihatsu] [Wataru's blood chills slightly, reading some of that. _I haven't figured out if we're connected somehow_ ...Oh, I have, Satoshi. I have. And damned if I tell you. He actually gets up and makes himself some soup, before trying to reply to this. Slurping on instant ramen, he sits down in front of the computer, pulls his legs up to sit crosslegged on the chair, and focuses]. (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Evening of January 15, 2004 (Japan) / Morning of January 15, 2004 (Maine) Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Testing testing! To: Satoshi Watanabe Hey, don't worry about sounding like the hockey badasses you are. Just reading that made me grin. I got chills for you, man. Realizing you actually are up to the dreams you set for yourself, that sounds like the most amazing feeling. You rock. Re: school stuff, you know, you can always run stuff by me, I mean, for English check. I'm a native speaker too! :) But yeah, if Liam and Grant are more conveniently around, that's cool. And me.... Well... Did this ever happen to you, when things maybe started falling into place with Arcana stuff, that suddenly it was the most interesting thing in the world and everything else lost its color? Like, metaphorically? I'm not sure how I'm supposed to focus on like, the history of Brazilian immigration to Japan, when the world is freaking magic and I'm in the middle of it. There are things that are so infinitely more interesting and important than learning how to properly make a bar graph. Did you ever struggle with this? I'm having such a hard time right now... On that note.... okay. You've convinced me. I'll be up front with them. Last time I wrote to you, I wanted to tell you something, but then I chickened out. And it's dumb, so please don't tell the others? And please don't laugh at me, even if you want to. Just this one time, even if you think it's too silly, maybe don't be 100% honest with me, because it's a feeling in me that's connected to a lot of stuff and I don't think I could handle being shot down right now. I'm scared of them, Satoshi. That's the goddamn truth. Please don't tell them and please don't laugh. I know I probably shouldn't be, but I just am. I'm scared of them, and I'm scared of them knowing what I can do. Tell me I can trust them, or tell me to be careful. But please, tell me something. Sorry for the drama. Have a good day, huh? W. [Wataru hits send, finishes his soup, and gets ready for bed. And lies awake for most of the night, staring at the faint green and red of traffic lights intermittently reflected onto his ceiling.] --- [Ciara] Satoshi reads Wataru's e-mail that morning before he heads off to class. That's going to take some time to really, properly respond to, time he doesn't have right now. But he does have time to send off a fast e-mail or two to someone else... (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Evening of January 15, 2004 (Japan) / Morning of January 15, 2004 (Maine) Subject: Question To: Haruko Kinsha Haruko, I know you kind of went over this in your e-mail a while back, and I meant to follow up with you but then I got distracted by the road trip and then talking about the road trip and other things, but... your impressions of Wataru, when you met up with him, they were pretty good, right? Like he came off as someone who wanted to help and who you would be reasonably happy to work with? Also, we need to schedule a chat sometime. You got me this webcam and I haven't actually used it to talk with you yet. And yes, we can try those wacky telepathy experiments that you were talking about if you still want to do them. Satoshi --- [Grysar] (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Evening of January 15, 2004 (Japan) / Morning of January 15, 2004 (Maine) Subject: Re: Question To Satoshi Watanabe Short version, sure. I mean the big caveat is that I get the definite impression that I'm sharing more with him than he is with me. That said, if we look at the percentage of secrets shared, we're probably proceeding at a similar pace unless he was far more involved than he was letting on. I mean, I'm still going to be cautious, I think everything is moving in the right direction. I'd like to talk to Izumi-san, I'm totally forgetting her surname. ^^; but if she backs up what he's said then I think we're definitely on a solid foundation. Regardless, like I said after I met him, I'm willing to work with him to take on the legacy of the Pentacle and that's not because I'm just blowing off the risk. But yeah, we should totally experiment! (Haruko then goes on to talk scheduling, as usual her social calendar is complicated) Kinsha Haruko --- [Ciara] (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Evening of January 15, 2004 (Japan) / Morning of January 15, 2004 (Maine) Subject: Re: Re: Question To: Haruko Kinsha Haruko, Thanks. I feel like I should know Izumi's surname, since I played against her brother some, but it's just not coming to me. If it comes up I can probably ask Wataru. I'm kind of curious about what you mean by "I'm just blowing off the risk," but we can talk about that more "in person," so to speak. (More scheduling stuff!) Talk to you soon! Satoshi --- [Ciara] (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Morning of January 16, 2004 (Japan) / Evening of January 15, 2004 (Maine) Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Testing testing! To: Wataru Yamada Thanks. That really means a lot. I'm going to keep practicing and playing hard and hopefully things will keep going the way they have been. I don't intend to let up for a moment. I was kind of hesitant to ask because I figured you were busy with your own classes, but if you're willing to look my stuff over, I'd definitely appreciate it. Also, it turns out that I was wrong about us not having any classes together this semester; Grant switched into my Trig section yesterday. So now I've actually got someone to sit with! Meanwhile I'll bet Liam's over in Calc 2 or something. But we can still all study together. Okay, so... I really, really do not intend for this to come out like "you weren't there and you wouldn't understand." That is honestly not my intent at all. You've just got a different perspective because of when you came in. But yeah. My grades did slip during the time when everything went down, because we were involved in so much. It wasn't that I wasn't interested in my classes, though. They were almost an oasis of normalcy during all of that insanity. There was a part of me that really wanted things to go back to the way they had been, where I was a normal student at a normal school doing normal things. I tried to concentrate, but you're right; your mind can't help but drift some. In my case, though, it wasn't so much that the world was magic. It was that the world was *dangerous*. It's less dangerous now, but... man. I don't want to be all "blah blah blah study hard and that's the most important thing," but your life isn't just Arcana. You're a guy getting a Sociology degree, and you owe it to yourself to do really well at that, too. Even if I have to agree that bar graphs do sound pretty boring. Does what I said even make sense? It's kind of rambling, I know. I just... It's a balance, and I can't say that I'm really good at it myself because I tend to go the other way and *not* think about Arcana most of the time. I promise you that I'm not laughing. I wouldn't. This whole thing really can be overwhelming, and if I were in your position I'd probably be scared, too. I haven't said a word to any of the others about how you're feeling. They're my friends, and I trust them. You're my friend, and I trust you. I'm not stupid or naive enough to believe that all my friends are going to be friends with each other, but I would hope that you all can be civil enough to work together. So yeah. It'll be good for you to have other perspectives than just mine. And you can always run things by me afterwards. Sorry I couldn't get back to you sooner. I wanted to have time to sit down and think things out. Hope your day's good too, Wataru. Take care of yourself, okay? Satoshi --- [Jihatsu] (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Morning of January 16, 2004 (Japan) / Evening of January 15, 2004 (Maine) [about 10 minutes later] Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Testing testing! To: Satoshi Watanabe You're the best, Satoshi. I'm going to put my faith in the fact that you trust these guys. Gotta run for class, but, meeting K&H this afternoon...! I'll let you know how that goes. I'm having them just come over to my place.... Maybe we can talk about "dangerous" at some point. I feel like I am missing a BIG part of the puzzle. There's a few people I met, who were capital-T Trouble, but somehow I get that you guys have been through a lot - a LOT - more. Especially if there are some real dangers still out there, I'd like to know more about them. (Maybe I can ask K&H too?) Oh, I wanted to say... I don't want you too feel too much responsibility or anything, that like, I am trying to take your advice and draw inspiration from the things we talk about. Really, it's just really great to have someone I can really talk to (even when I use the word 'really' too much)... I realize I'm laying a lot of SATOSHI WHAT DO I DO ABOUT LIFE on you. But I don't want you stressing over it, all right? ^_^ ....and on that note I'm gonna see what I can do about focusing more on school like you said. LOL I had to change Stats sections because of some scheduling snafu and the administration was super Japanese and apologetic about it, but upside is no more 8 AM classes! Downside is I had it yesterday and now I have to take it again today cause there's another teacher and stuff. Yay for dragging through essentially the same lesson twice. Anyway! Sleep well, talk to you soon :) W. --- [Jihatsu] (Unencrypted email from phone, sent about 40 minutes later) OMFG NO NO NO I REALLY DID NOT KNOW THE DOWNSIDE TO SWITCHING STATS SECTIONS BEFORE. THERE IS A NEW DOWNSIDE, THE DOWNEST OF SIDES. WHY IS A BASEBALL-PLAYING BUSINESS MAJOR TAKING STATISTICS FOR SOCIAL SCIENCE STUDENTS. WORST CLASS JUST GOT EVEN WORSE. MAYDAY ABANDON SHIP --- [Ciara] Encrypted e-mail) Date: Late Morning of January 16, 2004 / Late Evening of January 15, 2004 Subject: Good luck! To: Wataru Yamada Wow, this afternoon? Good luck! I'll be thinking about all of you guys. Let me know if any of you hear me. ;) (Okay, I'll probably be asleep, but still.) Seriously, though, I really, really hope things go well. Yes, there was a lot. It's part of why I think everyone's so surprised that you really weren't all that involved. It encompassed a bunch of different people and places. I mean, pretty much anything weird that you heard rumors about back then was probably related. The most immediate thing right now, though, might be Uehara's brother and the books. You were there when we were talking about them at the dinner, so ...crap, I haven't asked about Uehara or read the book yet. Maybe I am not the best person to be consulting on more recent Arcana matters. ^^; And if you do ask about what might still be out there... I'd phrase it very, very carefully. Or maybe wait for them to bring the subject up. That might be better. And don't worry about it. I guess I'm not really used to people asking me for advice, and then I'm worried about what if I give you the wrong answer and I make things worse. (See the previous paragraph.) ...man, sometimes I wish I could be the guy I am on the ice all of the time. Does that make sense? Also, I feel like I have to point out that baseball's pretty full of statistics. ;) Hang in there, Wataru. You can do it. Satoshi --- [Jihatsu] (Encrypted e-mail) Date: Afternoon of January 16, 2004 / Very early morning of January 16, 2004 Subject: Re: Good luck! To: Satoshi Watanabe Thanks for the good luck wishes!! I'll need it. I skipped my afternoon class to clean my apartment. Don't tell the girls. I think it's okay now though, but I wish I could have done the laundry. Anyway. Honestly? We can talk more about this later, but I think part of why I wasn't involved before was that I was trying really really hard to avoid it. I'm scared now, but I used to be a lot more scared then. Maybe especially of myself... I didn't really want to give myself the chance to be in situations where... Well, you know. Anyway. I'll feel my way around the conversation today, then. I'll see what they want to talk about. Open with moose, and then once everyone's laughing at your poor Canadian friend's expense I'll hit them with hard paintbrush facts. Or something. Ahhhhh I'm so nervous. I haven't had anyone over who was not Izumi or you in like, it can't possibly be ever but it sure feels like it??? I sometimes wish I could be the guy I am when I'm reading the cards all the time, so I think I get it. There's times where everything just makes sense and is easy and you don't even need to think. And you forget to doubt or hate yourself... Anyway, they're coming in like 20 minutes - should I make tea or something??? Get ice cream at the conbini downstairs? Girls like ice cream, right? Or will it look like I'm trying too hard? --- [Ciara] Sadly for Wataru, by the time he sends this e-mail Satoshi has gone to sleep, and so any responses will not come until after the meeting has occurred. [End!]