[Grysar] (Encrypted) Date: Middle evening of January 14, 2004 Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Road Trip Story To:Kaede Takeuchi: > I do not understand your jokes. Takeuchi-san, Laying my cards on the table, I've never been that funny among people that aren't trying to flirt with me. The times when I do get a laugh are often based on having a shared unstated understanding of something or my correctly listening to and interpreting the other person. I've been trying to build our relationship, but humor is probably the wrong method there. I know Satoshi is a bit worried about the two of us and Yamada-san working together on the ritual for Ozora-san. I think we'll be fine, or at least the Pentagram's legacy, and not old coordination problems, is the real threat. I appreciate your being blunt but not harsh in your emails with me. I'm glad we can work together to help Ozora-san. Kinsha Haruko --- [Rowyn] (Encrypted) Date: Late Morning of January 15, 2004 Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Road Trip Story To: Haruko Kinsha >I appreciate your being blunt but not harsh in your emails with me. I'm glad we can work together to help Ozora-san. I believe it will turn out fine. My worries are being too optimistic about this opportunity. I am glad you are far more realistic in our prospects than Yamada. This is a major artifact we are dealing with here and I am doubtful Ozara-san's condition will ever be the same. I am not certain he (Yamada) realizes the debt that we owe him (Ozara). I am not certain what you mean by harsh though. -Takeuchi --- [Grysar] (Encrypted - Reply to Kaede's individual e-mail) Date: Evening January 15, 2004 Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Road Trip Story To: Kaede Takeuchi On the harshness, I worry nuance might be lost in my answer via email. Perhaps something to discuss later? Short version, you've been making it easier for me to follow the advice you gave me long ago. Namely to consider the range of interpretations for your words and not to show reason and grace (my word) in choosing what interpretation makes sense. I think I'm a bit more optimistic than you, but aware of the difficulties and likely Ozara-san will remain changed even if he is healed to a degree. I've described our debt to Yamada-san in broad strokes, but even if he acknowledges it intellectually I doubt he understands it. Regardless, we should get to work. One first step I'd propose is getting Ozara-san to a doctor with a EEG machine (or a fMRI if we can get some financial support from Kyon). The cards say you can design this ritual, and I think that means neural circuitry of the brain and not undergoing a pilgrimage to become the greatest exorcist of our generation or some such. I'm hoping that the spirits of the sensors have picked up some of the expertise of those that have used them in past years, as one semester of psychology certainly doesn't qualify to do much more than know about them. (Haruko then proceeds to talk schedule. She says she'll coordinate with Wataru and offers a range of dates, reaching into late February.) Kinsha Haruko --- [Rowyn] Date: Day January 16, 2004 Subject: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: The Road Trip Story To: Haruko Kinsha (Encrypted of course) I would be surprised you had retained that advice at all. I suppose I do not respond often in e-mails because I do not feel e-mail is the best medium, both for privacy and for communication. But I do agree in moving forward and getting to work. I am not certain I would trust EEG machines to be accurate. Convincing Ozara (the sister) would be a particular difficulty as I am certain she does not wish to share his illness and the potential of the doctor's taking him to an institution may be high. Nevermind that the machines may not find anything due to it being not only Arcana but one of the most powerful Arcana situations in existance which is yielding this result. It may not show on any scan. Though...I believe it *would* be interesting to hear an EEG machine. See through its eyes and see what it detects. As for the past, I have never really held the past against anyone. You felt deem to ignore my counsel therefore I came to a point where it was no longer worthwhile to provide it. It appeared to be a mutually beneficial tactic to ignore each other's existence entirely. However, as you appear to be willing to work with me, I suppose I am obligated to see this through. Then we can get back to ignoring each other as usual. As appropriate, of course. We'll see where this leads. I do appreciate you being respectful in your responses though. ~Takeuchi Kaede --- [Grysar] (Encrypted) Date: Morning January 17, 2004 Subject: Re: Us To: Kaede Takeuchi I concede there's a reason you have such low expectations when I'm involved. I made the worst mistake of my life, left someone scarred, and involved you in it too because I was panicking. If I'd listened to your doubts rather than taking them personally, not of that would have happened. I know there are other times when I've let you, personally, down in addition to any number of failures during that blasted war. Moreover, that wasn't just advice you gave me that day. It was a bargain we made and you kept up your end by not putting yourself at risk unless the stakes were worth it and there wasn't a better way. So that piece of counsel I'll follow. In the future, I'll work on listening and make sure that even when I disagree with you, it's only after I fully understand what you're saying. Maybe that will be give us a new dynamic. Maybe it won't, but if I just need to actively work at it when we're doing something important together, so be it ,you're worth it. In the immediate term, what I'm hearing you say is that Yamada-san and I aren't yet giving full weight to the Pentacle. To elaborate on my end, I suspect the mental price Ozara-san is paying is a side effect, not the active intent or a security measure. To use a computer analogy, more like a computer scorched by a power surge than one infected by a vicious worm. However, I'm just speculating here. I think the EEG is worth trying, but perhaps we should learn more about the artifact first, hunting down Winston if we had to. I think it'll also be strangely satisfying to see Yamada-san pestering him while we stand by knowing some of the answers, but maybe that's just me. However, I also have a request of you. Please remember that the path forward is the Star: Hope, faith, and hard work. You've never had a problem with the last one, but to get through this I think we'll all need to believe in each other. I'm not worried about negativity or bad vibes ruining this, I think instead the risk is inertia and despair against challenges that seem insurmountable and camaraderie that's more trouble than it's worth. I appreciate what you've already done and I hope you'll keep giving me a chance, even if it sets you up for disappointment. I'll at least be there to listen as to why you were hurt. I know my debts to my comrades don't end with Ozora-san, and I think I'll have a better chance paying them if I'm not ignoring you. Haruko --- [Rowyn] Kaede looked over Haruko's latest response in the most dimly lit room of the three bedrooms that he and Akemi use as an apartment. There's a bit of a release of breath as the e-mail goes...better than he had hoped. There was always a worry with Kinsha-san that she'd overanalyze things, that she'd misinterpret, that she'd take it too far. Admittedly, in retrospect, perhaps he didn't need to point out the things that he did. But once out there, there is no turning back. And they were things that would be said eventually regardless. So best to have them out in the open earlier. Still, he breathed, drank his morning tea, shot off a couple of e-mails to some suit designers, some leads, even that damned stylist hovering over the back of his neck. *He* had no difficulty with scathing e-mails trying to sound polite. Oh well. In comparison to that, answering Kinsha- san seemed a practical blessing. His fingers stretched a couple of times as he thought of his response, trying to shut the voice of the computer out as he continued: =============================== Date: Morning January 17, 2004 Subject: Re: Us To Haruko Kinsha (Sipping his tea, Kaede looked at the previous email as his thoughts broiled around in his head, then adjusted his glasses to continue) Kinsha-san... I appreciate it. Make no mistake, the obligation I speak of isn't to any of you. It is to me. I made a commitment to see this through to the end. I do not go back on that... (His eyes drifted to the cup as he considered his next couple of words...) But you *have* held the Cup. I held the Pentacle. Even through cloth. Believe me, if anyone knows the power of the Pentacle who has not gone completely insane from it, it is me. The powers... (He paused as he considered, the most considerations he's ever put into an e-mail really.) The powers are still unknown to us. I believe a part of the ritual may involve finding remnants of the Pentacle in the first place, and that may fair be difficult. Beyond that, we do not know any who might analyze such pieces even if we do. Studies of the Eight directly may yield some results but I fear we may run into a state where, like a field, it is merely a blank spot in reality that no amount of mundane analysis may be able to explore. If Yamada-san were more open about the resources he had at hand, we may yet yield some results, though I still question his motivation, his prowess, and his agenda as well. I do not mean to come across as doubtful, merely skeptical and cautious.... (At this point, he grabs the tea cup to finish off his cup of tea and looks over Haruko's email once more to see if there's any he might have missed.) You owe no debt to me, Haruko. What I gave and what I provided was all of my own choosing. If frustration or fault came as a result of it, it is only a result of my own desire to see things through to the end. If you are willing to work with me, I see no reason to turn that down on the arbitrary reasoning that it has not worked in the past. If it achieves results, I am willing to do it. For what it is worth though, I do appreciate your response. -Takeuchi out =========================================== At one last moment, he squinted at the screen. Kyon, somehow, had gone through the process of mending and understanding his value first. He might have expected it over time. As much as they might have disagreed on approach, method and necessity was never far apart for them. Haruko though... He sighed. Well, they had far longer to go. But willingness to work together on her part...at least was a start...his eyes glanced to the time, then quickly bolted from his seat. Grabbing his pack and something quickly to eat, he pressed the power button on his computer and started out the door. That e-mail took longer than expected. He was almost late for class! --- [Grysar] That evening Haruko plops down in her chair and lets out a breath. She's had two things too many due today but stayed on top for the moment. She'd avoided looking at the email today, given her test earlier, but she's ready for it now. She checks through her first for her notebook as she goes, and ends up cleaning the thing out as she's been letting junk accumulate and she could use the distraction. Date: Evening January 17, 2004 Subject: Re: Re: Us To Kaede Takeuchi Takeuchi-san, At the meeting with Katie, I did learn a bit more about what he knew. Yamada-san was concerned the eight's absence from school back then when Ozara-san went to Osaka in search of the pentacle. Apparently Ozara-san had a card drawing search technique, involving regularly drawing cards, typically the Ace of Pentacles. Based on Yamada-san's divination, the" Haruko stops typing and finishes the search, laying out a few flyers and receipts and Auto club documents. "nine of swords came into play at the end. Not sure what that means, I don't have a nine in my files. According to my booklet, it's associated with fears, terrors, and deeply rooted guilt. That might be a lead. However, it will probably better for you to hear more from Yamada-san first hand, as with anything supernatural nuance can easily be lost in transmission. I know with the cup, I felt an overwhelming sense of selflessness. I could easily imagine pouring myself out entirely and even now it's memory sometimes haunt me with images of those that I did not heal." She scans down his email more and reads over the bit on debts and then obligations, a bit confused. She briefly considers asking a question to Maki but then remembers how cross her roommate can get when asked to parse out the Queen's tangled network of relations. She starts writing, frequently self-censoring and even checking a word or two in the dictionary until she's happy with the outcome. "Thank you for your statement on debt and obligations. Debt to you was not what I was referring to and whatever you say, I consider myself bound to our entire group by ties of war-time camaraderie. However, those burdens are not heavy. In the bad old days, before 9th floor cafe meetings and while Arcana nonsense kept you away from your shop, I did feel in your debt for the sacrifices you made for us. I never found ways to relieve it that were mutually agreeable, so I thank you for your grace in discharging my misapprehension. Finally, I have a silly and I hope easy favor to request. I could use your counsel on bicycles, perhaps when we meet with Yamada-san. As I mentioned in my email to Satoshi, while tricycles and bicycles were my first sets of wheels, I moved on to motor vehicles before I even had the proper chance to do so. I am envious at times at the extent to which you can commune with electronics (and, since I'm being honest, of the time you get to spend with Akemi-san but that's unrelated). I don't think that applies with bicycles, but I hope it means you'll understand what I mean when I say that since high school days I haven't felt the spirit of bicycles the way I do with various automotive vehicles. I certainly don't expect you to remedy my nonsense in that regard and due to upcoming furisode expenses I'm certainly not in a position to buy a bike this year. However, I'd appreciate your advice, from one mechanic to another, of where I could start with the intangibles." Her eyes fall on a flyer she received to days ago on the 15th. There were protesters handing out leaflets against the American war in Iraq . Their numbers weren't nearly as great as last year and her part of Tokyo Tech was always fairly apolitical. Still, after the big meeting, her eyes fall on a reprinted quote "you may murder the hater, but you do not murder hate. In fact, violence merely increases hate. Returning violence for violence multiplies violence, adding deeper darkness to a night already devoid of stars." She finishes the email with a quick. "Peace, Haruko." She then stands up and query Maki, flyer in hand "I'm going to be hitting the library, you need any books while I'm there?" --- [Ciara] Maki looks up from her computer for a second and shakes her head, then goes back to doing her homework. [And so Haruko went to the library, alone, to do who knows what. End!]